10 tips to break up with him

imageBy Jessica Booth

Ending a relationship is always difficult, even if you’re the one ending it. It’s hard to go into something knowing you’re about to really hurt someone you care about, but sometimes it’s also completely necessary.

To make sure your breakup isn’t as terrible as those that have the potential to be, I’ve put together a list of 10 tips on how to break up with your boyfriend in the easiest way possible.

• Be sure this is what you want: Before you go through with this breakup, make sure you’re absolutely positive that this is what you want. I know that can be hard to figure out, but once you dump someone, it can be tough to fix things.

You may also want to have a talk with your boyfriend first – you don’t have to tell him you’re considering ending things, but you can address the issues you guys are having and try to fix them. If things seem hopeless, though, then it’s time.

• Plan it out: Don’t go into this sort of conversation with absolutely nothing planned – that’s a disaster waiting to happen. It might help if you make a list: write down the reasons you’re doing this and why you don’t think it can be fixed.

• Don’t keep putting it off: Once you make the decision to end things, you need to decide when to do it. Don’t put this off forever as you try to wait for the perfect moment.

Honestly, there is no “right” time to break up – breakups suck no matter when they happen. You shouldn’t stay in a relationship that doesn’t make you happy just because you’re waiting for the right moment to end things.

• Be prepared for his reaction: Be prepared for how your guy will react. Is he the type to get super angry and start yelling? Is he the kind of guy who is going to start crying right in front of you? Will he just blow you off?

You might have an idea, but you never know how someone is going to react to this type of stuff, so just be prepared for something emotional.

• Do it in person: Breakups are best done in person, face-to-face. It shows that you respect the person and it also shows that you’re not a total coward. Yes, dumping someone over a text message or Facebook is easy, but it’s also mean.

• Be as calm as you can: Try to be as calm as possible. It’s not going to be fun, but try not to start crying, yelling or being really dramatic.

Breakups are emotional, even if you’re the one doing the breaking up. But attempting to have a mature conversation about this stuff is better than both of you yelling and sobbing, right?

• Explain yourself: Give this dude some legit reasons for why you’re dumping him. Don’t just walk into the room and be like, “Oh, I’m breaking up with you. We can’t be friends. Bye.”

Do this guy the courtesy of explaining what went wrong here – it will help him get closure in the end so that he’s not constantly wondering what he did wrong.

• Let him talk: Let him express himself, too. Sometimes people feel like they need to say certain things at the end of a relationship. Let him explain himself and say how he feels about the whole situation, don’t just shut him out.

It’s just a courtesy thing – how would you feel if you were being dumped and couldn’t say what you wanted to say?

• Don’t cave: In fact, your boyfriend may even start begging you to give him a second chance or to reconsider. Chances are, if you’ve made it this far, you really do want to break up.

Sometimes when we’re in a situation where someone we care about is begging us for another chance, we give in because we start to feel really guilty and maybe even a little apprehensive.

However, if you went into this absolutely certain that this was what you wanted, don’t agree on a second chance – it’s not going to work out and it’s just going to prolong the breakup.

• End all contact: Once the breakup is over, it’s time to end all contact with this guy. I know that sounds super harsh, but it’s important. Maybe you guys can be friends one day, when you’ve both moved on, but not now.

Don’t let him continue to call and text you and definitely don’t hang out afterwards. Disconnecting from each other is sometimes the best way to get over each other.

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source: capital FM.